Author: Kinzie

Today, I write of love.

Of all the holidays, I can think of none with the power to stir more anxiety and pile more stress on more people than the one day of the year named in honor of Christian saints and intended to celebrate romantic love.

Today is a favorite day because I love writing and I love love.

If we believe all the hype, we might be convinced that today is all about getting the perfect card and buying the perfect gift and choosing the perfect flowers and booking the best table at the perfect restaurant for the perfect date and the perfect meal with our perfect partner.

This is so wrong when there is so much love around us every day.

It took a while to figure it out, but after years of missing out, I finally discovered that love is not something we get — it is something we share with each other.

To be honest, I have not celebrated Valentine’s Day with a partner for a really long time because I taken the time to heal deep scars and nurture a relationship with myself and it turned into a really long time.

In those early years, I bought into the fear and felt a bit lonely and pathetic amidst all the public declarations of love. Then I rejected it completely as yet another commercial ploy so it meant nothing at all.

Today the holiday is an opportunity to express my love …

I love everyone who recognizes the miracle of life.

I love everything about our natural world.

I love couples who take their wedding pictures everywhere.

I love the local market vendors selling a variety of colorful produce I don’t recognize.

I love youth whose dream for the future is to make a difference.

I love parents who listen to their children and question the system.

I love people who dream of a zero-waste economy.

I love the teacher who started caring for the homeless and started a movement.

I love the government that just allocated $45M for community action projects.

I love our eco-heroes who go out of their way to raise awareness.

I love the men and women who make it easy for me to get everywhere.

I love the growing appetite for produce and products with minimum processing and packaging.

I love local entrepreneurs who balance healthy profits with a healthy social impact.

I love the child who hasn’t yet learned now not to freely express herself.

I love Hongkongers who are thinking beyond the mall and exploring ways to live a greener life.

I love chefs who take the time to source ingredients in the spirit of sustainability.

I love this crazy fishing village that calls itself Asia’s World City where diversity is in our heritage.

I love listening to the birds singing the sunrise and sunset each day.

I love our passionate professionals taking an holistic approach to personal health.

I love the ladies who spoke up in favor of a socially conscious approach to menstrual health.

I love the beaches and the volunteers who choose to celebrate with a Valentine’s Day Beach Cleanup.

I love the beautiful country parks that are the lungs of Hong Kong — a quick trip from the urban jungle.

I love local farmers who defend our right to grow food.

I love the guy and his son who showed us a polite way to trash the checkout.

I love our expanding community of conscious decision-makers.

Sometimes I think it’s simply a sign of age that I have become more understanding and accepting but I realize it is not only about age. It is my willingness to end my suffering by experiencing the pain I avoided for years with shopping and eating and unhealthy relationships.

I know a lot of people a lot older than me who have yet to realize that what we resist persists; that the quickest way to feed anger is to get angry; that hate is the best way to feed hate; that blame is the quickest way to avoid blame and that love wins every single time.

I am learning how to love by finding the courage to face my fears, speak my truth, walk my talk and be my best me.

To whom will you write your love?

Naturally,

Founder
heartbeat.com.hk
natural life in the fast lane

Everything is connected.
Listen to your own heartbeat.

“This is not a letter but my arms around you for a brief moment.” Katherine Mansfield

Be social

A soul sister regularly visits that Dhaka café on business trips. A young mom friend arrived at the Istanbul airport on summer holiday with her kids hours after it reopened last week. A straight friend from Florida has danced with his wife at Pulse. All my friends in Paris happened to stay home that night. A long time friend arrived at his downtown Jakarta hotel later that day. A social friend had family staying in the Mumbai hotel. Many Hong Kong friends had close friends on holiday in Bali. I missed visiting the Colombo market by 5 minutes. A work friend lost his brother in the World Trade Center.

Over the weekend, a long-time friend invited me to a remote private residence high in the hills for his birthday/leaving party. We hiked up Friday afternoon and solved all the world’s problems over a bonfire late into the night. There was no phone signal and, try as I might, I couldn’t connect to the wi-fi on Saturday morning. I took it as a sign and switched off.

We returned to civilization after a lovely lunch with new friends on Saturday and when I got home in the evening, I had lost the urge to check my phone so I decided to leave it off. The feeling remained when I woke on Sunday so I took the big decision, unplugged my wi-fi and left the world of social media behind me.

Over the course of the day, I became aware of how many times I have the urge to check something on my phone. If I hadn’t switched everything off, I might have given in, but discipline won out. By Monday morning, I was really beginning to believe I had missed something, but then I couldn’t imagine what that might be, other than a stupid pet trick or a host of posts about how we are fucking up the planet or a life hack to save time so I have more time to waste or a personal attack on a popular figure or two in the name of humor. I didn’t turn anything back on until after I finished my morning tea. I trusted my friends would still be my friends and probably wouldn’t even notice I had gone missing in cyberspace.

While I was disconnected, I began noticing things around my space that could use a little attention. I relaxed. I read. I cooked. I sorted. I cleared. I watched a movie. I did some writing with pen and paper.

I felt a sense of freedom lined with the guilt of being out of touch.

I make it my business to connect and until this weekend, I did not recognize the importance of a proper disconnect. I have started putting my phone in another room when I am relaxing and noticing the frequency of impulses to check it. I imagine it is like the impulse to light a cigarette or open a bottle of wine or switch on the tv or buy something frivolous just to feel better. I am seeing more digital detox retreats offered locally and by wellness sanctuaries across Asia and they all sound a bit like the rehab we could all use.

I have chosen to create a space where we can connect easily with each other for good. Taking time away from that space offers perspective. I started my week with a new feature to update you with fresh listings on the website directory. Today, I am running late with the newsletter because everyone’s back from holiday and calendar listings are backing up because the new design takes more time, but I will learn to live the cost of rest.

My constant near and far connecting with others has come at the cost of a connection here and now with me.

In our world with diminishing privacy, it is essential we give ourselves a bit of private time.

How will you switch off for you?

[from HK heartbeat]

In one of my first jobs as communications director for a school division, I met for coffee with a friend who is a journalist. During our time together, we talked about my ideas for a publicity campaign that involved the students. When we wrapped up, I offered to buy his coffee. His refusal came with an education in the ethics of journalism. No exchange is made for stories or articles. He loved my idea but would not be willing to write about it if I paid him anything. Not even a cup of coffee at 1980’s prices. I was impressed, not only by his values but by his willingness to educate me on how it worked.

Since that day, I have never entertained journalists other than provided beverages and snacks at a media conference as a matter of public courtesy. Media releases are distributed with enough information to attact an enquiry if the content fits with a piece they are working on. As a publisher, I am regularly disappointed by clients who ask for a feature before committing to advertising. It never happens. Either we agree to an advertising contract or I move on.

“I believe the most important thing for the media is to be objective, fair and balanced. We should not report something with preconceptions or prejudice.” Jack Ma, Alibaba

I am regularly offered free treatments in exchange for writing about them. I am not a reviewer. Unless I am a paying customer, there is a part of me that holds back on criticism, constructive or otherwise, if I have received something — anything — in exchange for editorial content.

5 media relations tips

1. Deliver a news release with an offer to provide additional information on request.
2. Send an email release with the content in the body, not an un-trusted attachment.
3. Provide a description with all relevant details and without ad-like hype or flourish.
4. Save the exclamation points, upper case and bold for your social media comments.
5. Ensure you include your direct contact details and double check the information

BONUS TIP : Never expect an article will be published

Real journalists value original content, fresh information and respectful relationships.

Today, there are plenty of social media opportunities and independent bloggers ready to write about a product or service in exchange for exposure. This is advertising — it is not objective content. It is not news. It is opinion and it is a paid opinion. That is promotion.

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